I received a healthy response to my last writing. That morning and afternoon I had been riding an inner hurricane. I had a good cry at a yoga class in Morro Bay, California. I felt like something opened in me and experienced a strong desire to share my history of Looking at myself.
I got an email from my dad this next morning. It said this:
Make no mistake about it, despite whatever doubts you have had, you are now and always have been an incredibly beautiful girl/woman in both body and soul. Take a look at the attached, have you ever seen anything so beautiful? [Followed by a photo my dad took of me on one of our XC ski adventures.]
And from my mom:
The wisdom and grace that you possess at a relatively young age is an amazing, beautiful thing. You have figured out many important things about yourself that took me many, many years to understand, and have given me so many gifts that sometimes you feel like the mom and I feel like the daughter.
You are always in my mind and my heart my spectacular girl. I love you more than you’ll ever know.
Plus support from many other loved ones. And shared feelings from women friends. Why is it so difficult for us to believe we’re not enough?
One of my favorite quotes from Cheryl Strayed’s Dear Sugar column is this:
Acceptance is a small, quiet room.
To accept something doesn’t require fanfare or vast effort. It is a simple decision made quietly. I accept what has been given to me by my loving parents, a healthy body and brain and heart.